!dediced s'tI

• Green, Green Dress: A deep green velvet dress with twenty buttons and a strap. What a pleasure to unwrap.
• Dark Dream in Wonderland: A copy of Alice in Wonderland, except Alice’s name has been replaced with yours. That’s the power of public domain, baby!
• Flower Witch's Familiar: Awww what a pretty potted flower-- wait hang on. There's a mouse in here?!
• Cat Pillow: An incredibly soft pillow that looks like a sleeping cat.
• Fruit & Nut Basket: A large red straw basket filled with oranges, grapefruits, several varieties of apples, pecans, walnuts, and Brazil nuts. Unfortunately, a nutcracker is not included. (partially consumed)
• Bath Robe: IT'S SO FLUFFY.
• 100 Paper Clips: It's quite literally a hundred paper clips, all linked together in one very long chain.
• Vuvuzela: A large horn thBWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-
• Axe: A two-handed axe that looks a little heavy, but even a twig person can lift it if they have enough rage.
• Cool Futuristic Swords: A pair of, well, cool futuristic swords that were scavenged from a crime scene.
• Ibuprofen: A general use pain reliever.
• Zwei: An adorable black and white corgi who seems entirely unbothered by how he got here. Bork! A gift from Penny.
• Crown: A simple gold-looking crown with fake gems inset. For sure not real gold.
• Manaka-Chopping Axe: A large, sturdy axe perfect for becoming a lumberjack.

• Monster Finger Puppets: Everyone loves these guys!
• Rose in Vitro: A small rose stored inside a test tube. Makes a great gift. It's good for both hellos and farewells. In the language of flowers, a red rose means passionate love.
• Business Shriek: This issue has a featurette on the rise of a company known as "Monsters Inc".
• Ration: A set of canned and vacuum-sealed foodstuffs. The taste isn't bad, and certain snakes that enjoy hide-and-go-seek are just crazy about it.
• Wunderbar: The best invention to hold everything up!
• Thresh Prince Poster: A large poster for an old TV show starring Troll Will Smith.
• Beans: A leather pouch with four beans inside. They don't seem to do much.
• Pin-Up Calendar?: A calendar for the year 1965, featuring lurid pictures of… large men in full diving suits?
• Oblaat: A thin, edible film made from starch. It's commonly used as a candy wrapper, but also helps cover up the taste of bitter medicine.
• Hello, My Name Is ____: An empty nametag, with some glitter markers and fun stickers to decorate it.
• White Suit: A fancy-looking red-and-white suit that smells faintly of flowers.
• Millennium Prize Problems: These seven important mathematical problems were posted by the Clay Mathematics Institute, with a reward of one million dollars for each one solved.
• Half-Eaten Plant: Now what bozo would eat the leaves off a perfectly good fern?! A gift from Shin.
• Glitter Bomb: An unmarked tube that explodes in a cloud of glitter when opened.
• Oxy-Clean: BILLY MAYS HERE TO TELL YOU ABOUT OXY-CLEAN-
• Sing-A-Ma-Jig: Your fuzzy singing pal!
• Bag of Cat Treats: A plain plastic baggie of what looks like homemade cat treats, with a label in English stating 'For Sissel.' (one eaten and regretted)
• Wedding Ring: Engraved on the inside with “God Send me Well to Keep”. Fit for a Queen.
• Ruby Slippers: A pair of shiny ruby shoes. Clicking the heels together makes a very satisfying sound.
• Scented Candle: A small candle that smells of pumpkin spice when burned.
• WILFRED WARFSTACHE: A bright pink, fake mustache.
• Canadian Flag: O, Canada....
• Multivitamins: A large bottle of daily vitamin tablets that might increase your stats and boost friendship. Take with water.
• Krazy Gloo: Caution, may adhere to skin. Dries instantly.
• Fridge Poetry Kit: Now you too can make nonsensical poems or leave really disjointed messages on any handy metal surface!
• Stabbing Knife: A knife that's perfect for stabbing someone! Except...the blade is dull, and retracts back into the handle when pressed upon. Maybe you can fake a stabbing.
• Scroll: A personal data pad owned by one Pyrrha Nikos. Plenty of pictures on here. A gift from Pyrrha.
• Shipping Tea: "Chardyn" is a unique blend of blueberry, cherry, and... gingerbread?
• Green Glasses: A pair of steampunky golden glasses with green lenses. Wow, it's all grand and it's all green!
• Turn Off the Lawsuit: A plastic neck brace with a an almost illegible signature starting with a "P" (but maybe an "R") scribbled on it in black sharpie.

No Longer Have:

• Bottled Water: A bottle of clear mountain spring water. (never have I ever'd)
• Churro: Fried dough, sugar, and cinnamon. All in one beautiful combination. (eaten)
• Dry Ice: A lump of vaguely smoking ice in a plastic bag. Just add water and you get some very convincing fog! I wouldn't recommend putting it in your cocktail though unless you like the taste of burning. Handle with gloves. (sublimated)
• Carmine Heifer: IT GIVES YOU ENERGGGGGGY!!! (eaten)
• Grape Ring Pop: If you collect a bunch of them and put all of them on at once, you can become Ring Pop Royalty. (eaten)
• I Hate My Husband Pie: A bittersweet chocolate pie drowned in caramel. It tastes delicious but it leaves you feeling a little miserable afterwards. (eaten and regretted)
• Raygun Zurion: Created with hi-tech future technology. A single shot can melt every molecule in a fully grown human. There aren't any batteries, though, so you can't fire it... (given to Yl'lb)
• An Actual Live Chicken: HOLY SHIT WHY WAS THIS HERE IT'S GETTING FEATHERS EVERYWHERE wHAT THE FUCK (freed)
• Frosted Honey Bun: A delicious baked treat, individually wrapped. (individually eaten)
• Cinnamon Bun: Mmm! Sweet and delicious and tastes exactly like the first time you ever had a cinnamon bun. (eaten)
• Baguette: MARIE! THE BAGUETTES! HURRY UP! (eaten)
• Magic Nut: Or with powers blocked, maybe it's just a normal nut? A gift from Anna. (eaten)
• Wizard's Familiar: A small furry toy that moves when you pet it. It looks...odd. (thrown into the bonfire)
• Lemon: This is a lemon. (eaten during the starvation motive)
• Wedding Robes, Never Worn: Handmade white robes decorated with silk flowers and gold embroidery, designed to look like a combination of Aeaean and Titanian fashions. Big enough to fit a very, very tall man and includes a gender neutral veil. (returned to Orthrus)